Blogging, what does it mean to me?

Blogging, what does it mean to me?

After having recently created this blog in December, I am struggling to find my voice.  What niche will I fit into? What artistic approach do I want to take?  Would I rather give advice on life?  Do I just want to share my decorating thoughts and ideas?

I feel myself being pulled in a hundred different directions trying to decide what I want this blog to become, what aspect of myself I want it to portray.  Then I realized, I don’t have to find my niche.  I intend this blog to be a representation of me, my mind, my thoughts, my life.  I am not able to put myself in a box, to pick one aspect of my personality and interests and focus on that alone.  I’m a grounded mess, full of contradictions and overlapping interests and personality traits.  I am the light and the dark.  Embrace it all and share it.  What’s the worst that can happen?

So now that I’ve embraced that I can use this platform in whatever way I choose, I can begin to let my thoughts and ideas flow.  The difficulty now lies in organizing my thoughts and choosing the mood of my individual posts.  I have the opposite of writer’s block.  I have hundreds of ideas and thoughts whirling around my mind, so where on earth do I start?

I think my strategy will be focusing on the thought/idea that inspires the most feeling and motivation in me at the moment and expounding upon that within a post.  My problem is that I’m a bit like a shotgun.  I have an idea that I shoot out spraying dozens of pellets in all different directions, instead of one single target.  I’m all over the place, but this is telling of my personality.  I am high energy, bouncing from one topic to the next always inspired and excited about the world and the intricacies within.  So, why not allow my blog to mirror this?  Why do I feel like I must tame myself and create an organized, mapped out version of thoughts and interests?  That is not me.  I must have some organization and plan to follow in my life for stability; but my mind, my thoughts, those will never be completely tethered and organized.  I shall embrace this aspect of my personality and allow my blog to mirror the real me.

I have always lived my life with a great measure of fear of the judgement of others.  Ever since I was a little girl, the thoughts and opinions of others meant a great deal to me.  I genuinely love people and I want to be loved in return.  This fear of judgement and rejection, however, should not hold me back from expressing myself and allowing me to be open and honest with the world.

So I challenge myself to not allow fear and trepidation to hold me back from sharing my thoughts and ideas, and to allow them just to flow naturally.  Just like the ebbing and flowing of my emotions;  from calm and tranquil to torrential and confusing.  This is who I am and it is only natural that this should be mirrored in my blog.

Before I leave, I would like to acknowledge and thank the bloggers who have read and appreciated my posts thus far.  It is gratifying and exciting to know that others have shown appreciation and interest in what I have to say.  I am very much looking forward to diving deeper within this community and seeing where all of your wonderful ideas, creativity, and insights lead me.  Thank you!